“I’ve done it before.”

I can’t remember ever being what the average person would refer to as “skinny.”

I mean, there’s a picture of me in kindergarten where I look like a lean, mean, playground-wrecking machine, but in every school picture to follow, year after year, I look bigger and bigger.

I was a chubby kid, but I never felt “fat” until a presentation in one of my 7th grade classes. I can’t remember all of the details, but my friends and I had filmed some kind of movie about a scary monster or something. For some reason I was the scary monster and for some reason I wasn’t wearing a shirt (brown beast, lol).

I came running into the frame, and it was supposed to be scary (or funny), I’m sure, but when the kids laughed, they didn’t laugh at the film. They laughed at me and my flabby stomach.

I never felt the same after that. Emotionally, I’ve been “The Funny Fat Guy” and “The Fat Friend Who Doesn’t Get the Girl.” Weight heavily impacted how I felt about myself in my teens and early 20s.

Physically, I can’t remember the last time I didn’t feel like an outcast at every major clothing store. Hell, I can’t honestly remember the last time I was under 200 lbs.

But there’s one thing I do know. I can lose this weight — I’ve done it before.

In 2005 I went from 238 lbs. to 202 lbs., and it only took a few months. It was the result of going to the gym six days a week and counting nearly every calorie I put in my mouth. I felt great accomplishing the loss, but I gained it all back, and 30 lbs. more, in the next five years. At my wedding, the biggest I’ve ever been,  I was 267 lbs. with a 47-inch waist. I dropped a few pounds before I started this blog, but these last 12 weeks have been the biggest push to take back my life that I’ve made in quite some time.

I’ve never put these thoughts on paper, I can’t say I’ve shared them with anyone, ever. But through all of this weight-related misery, I see one sentence that makes the rest of it irrelevant.

“I’ve done it before.”

Only, this time, I’m more knowledgeable about my body and I’m more focused on nutrition than exercise. Before, I worked out to lose weight. Now, I eat right to be healthy. The weight loss is a result of that.

I’ll will never have to say “I’ve done it before” again, because this time I am doing it for life.

As for the scale: Today I weigh 237.7 lbs. I weighed 240.1 lbs. last Monday, my 11th week of blogging. That’s a one-week loss of 2.4 lbs. I started this blog weighing 258 lbs. That’s a total loss of 20.3 lbs.

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12 thoughts on ““I’ve done it before.””

  1. That’s awesome Niyaz! Congratulations. I’m proud of you. Which sounds kinda weird if you think about it. I mean, I don’t even know you but I truly am proud of you.

    Keep up the great work. Following you on this journey so far has been fun and I look forward to your continuing culinary adventures.

    I also need to try me some of these recipes!

    1. Thank you Chris! I appreciate the support.

      You may not know me, but you’ve been privy to some of the things I’ve thought for years, but have never been courageous enough to say. So in a way, you know me better than some people have in my entire life. =)

      As for the recipes, I’d suggest the Chilean sea bass (http://thefatdudediet.com/2010/11/23/week-3-meal-1-fishgasm/) and Korean steak tacos (http://thefatdudediet.com/2011/01/14/week-10-meal-2-meat-candy-tacos/) as starting off points.

      Are there any themes or meals you would like to see on the blog that we haven’t done yet?

      1. I almost made the thyme crusted pork the other night. I had my wife up to the point I said polenta and she was like “ew…I don’t like polenta”. The last time we had it, it was just bland; I’m not sure if this version had more flavor to it. Maybe I’ll try to sneak it in one day when she’s not looking. LOL

        As for themes or meals I’d like to see…that’s a tough one. You guys seem to have done it all. Maybe Chef Brian can come up with some healthy desserts? I don’t think you’ve gone there yet, have you?

  2. Congrats on the weight loss! I think the key to permanent weight loss is a lifestyle change. Sure people can lose weight, but they’re looking to get to that magical number and once they get there, all bets are off. Looks like you’re getting that. I’m enjoying your blog and the recipes.

  3. Dude, you are AMAZING. Great job! I’m always looking forward to the chronicles of your journey. Seems like your mindset about your lifestyle normalizations are all in the right places. You are definitely an inspiration!

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